I’m ready to put King Creole in the ring with the big boys. I mean, how many Masters English majors can move like that? I would step over my own mother to get in a time machine to see any of his 80s performances. I’m putting him right up there with Talking Heads, just one notch tucked under, an asterisk of awesome. A Canadian and a Dominican walk into a bar, move to the Bronx, and you get this wonderful thing, baybay. If you ever need motivation to meet a deadline to write an abstract for a national conference, I highly suggest this option. And if you want crazy versions with lesser audio quality, I suggest this or this.
What up folken? So a few months ago some of the peeps who post on this site were like who the fuck reads Ghost Rider, going on to add that said individual must be to put it mildly a fucking loser, I held my tongue. Now that my balls have dropped a little (though the leg of that statement is just that a fucking elephant leg) I can safely say I do you arrogant prigs. With the venerable Jason Aaron (for those not in the know he writes Scalped as well, a wonderful rag about crime on the Sioux Rez) as it’s scribe this book is taking me for one hell of a ride. Nun’s with nun-chucks, killer nurses in skimpy clothing, and a Tibetan ghost rider for Buddha’s sake. So there, the real point of this is if you ain’t reading GR your the fucking loser. Sorry for all the cussing, I’ve been watching Deadwood. War new Sandman, Obama as prez, and the fact that I ate Ham on thanksgiving. Jabberwocky out!
I think we already lost the Chinamerica war, but our cultural character prevents us from going gentle into that good night, and we are not above playing dirty. For example, how do Asian Americans register in your world domination matrix? Did you factor in the exploitation of expat technology? Seriously though, where would the Humans be without Boomer? They needed a Cylon playing for their team. Allow me to direct your attention to Johnny Chung Lee:
Asian? Yes. American? Yes. Awesome? Yes! I have a total nerd crush on him right now. And if push came to shove, I’m pretty sure this guy could Macgyver your Flip Mino into some sort of cloaking device in under under five minutes.
Alright after watching about two hours of Fail videos I found this video. It’s definitely not a fail and maybe I’m going overboard but I love this guy. Chef Chardon is my new kitchen hero….okay, I take that back but I’m a fan. I wish he had his own show on the Food Network but until then here’s this.
By the way Canary, whenever you want to host your own video podcast cooking show I wanna be on it and be called Sleepy the Pot Washer. Also I think there should be a part where we pick out fresh fish while wearing mink coats. The best part of this video though is the random off set guest star Jermain Hopkins who played the fat kid from Lean on Me. I could use a personal Morgan Freeman a la Lean on Me to get me to pay my bills earlier…on time and clean the bathtub. I think my parents may have missed out by not giving me a regular hard jabbing index finger to the skull, I guess next time I don’t want to wash my dishes I’ll just be that crazy person that does it to themselves. It worked on Jermain since now he’s down shifted in his choice of drugs from crack to marijuana, although my only evidence is that he’s wearing a Ricky Williams jersey. I’m also really looking forward to watching Jermain Hopkins in I Wish I Had a House Like This, just because I think that may be one of the best titles to a movie I’ve ever heard and the title alone makes me want to write a companion movie called Must Be Nice. Luckily someone’s already recorded a cheesy song for the end credits.
And speaking of Fails…I didn’t want to post a ten minute clip but please if you’ve got time have some fun and watch this. All I need to say is that I think I actually like her and I’m stealing the line…Does anyone have any questions for this guy besides ‘are you kidding me’?
I’m conflicted. I hate John Mayer’s music. Whenever I hear it I feel like I’m wearing American Eagle cargo pants. My disgust makes me do disgusting things like when I found that my mama had bought Mayer’s first album and I hid it in one of her old tape bags; right between her soundtracks to Platoon and Nothing But Trouble. But now I found this stupid video and now I feel like I did after I found myself laughing at Dane Cook.
According to Japanese speakers on YouTube he said Jessica is a great girl and I’m very happy with her. E translated it wrong, or spoofed it, or whatever. My favorite part is when he tells Seacrest he’s happy…….with what he just did to him.
Alright, now off topic-just when I thought I couldn’t become a bigger fan of Bill Simmons I read this. I can’t describe how much I love it.
